I almost allowed Mother’s Day to slip up on me without preparing an appropriate article way in advance.
Of all the subjects I have written about in this column and in one of my books dealing with my upbringing, the subject of mothers has perhaps been one of the most consistent ones.
Certainly, due to the fact that I, like so many of you, owe so much gratitude and credit to our mothers for the people we are today.

These meritorious women suffered and paid the price of sacrifice and selflessness and often had to do without certain basics and conveniences so that we would have a better life than they did. In addition, these virtuous and valiant women often labored in the cotton fields and under the tobacco barns so that we would be able to have a place to stay, a meal to eat, clothes on our backs, and shoes on our feet. These women were known to have to do double duty by cooking, cleaning, and serving as mammies in the homes of rich folks and then having to come home and do the same for their own children. The following are just a few of the attributes and qualities of these mothers who are a rare breed and who are almost extinct.

Their Unwavering Compassion
Certainly, one of the qualities of meritorious mothers is their unwavering loyalty to their children. The ones I have learned about through study of history (like Susanna Wesley, Sarah Lincoln, and quite a few others) fit into the category of mothers who I am highlighting today, who had unwavering compassion for their children. Regardless of whether their children were brilliant and outstanding (like the Wesley brothers and Abraham Lincoln) or regular and very ordinary, great moms still loved them compassionately. I have seen this type of love in many of the mothers I have known down through the years. Even if their sons or daughters were what some would classify as “rebellious and downright no good”, the mothers who I am talking about in my column today still loved them with unconditional and unwavering love.

Their Loyalty
One of the marks of a meritorious mother is their loyalty and dependability. When no one else will stand by your side (whether you are right or wrong), the women I am commending and commenting on today will. This does not mean that they will endorse or support you when you are wrong, God forbid. What it does mean is that they will be there for you in the thick and thin or when you are right or wrong. Their presence and loyalty do not mean that they always agree with you, but that they will always be there to encourage and strengthen you. They will help to get you back on the right course when you are wrong. I know and am well familiar with two such mothers. First, my mother, who never endorsed or supported me when I was wrong, but who was one of my greatest allies and supporters when I was right. My wife has also proven to be cut from the same cloth when dealing with our two children.

They Do Not Have Favorites
This category applies to those mothers who have more than one child. In my mind, I often wanted to believe that I was my mother’s favorite child of the ten she bore and raised. However, again it was just my imagination running away with me (as is the title and theme of one of the Temptations greatest songs). Nothing could be further from the truth. Though I was, arguably, the most problematic and devious child she had who required more of her intervention and time to either get me out of trouble or keep me from getting into it, my mother had no favorites. She loved and favored us all equally. Though we were individuals with unique personalities and needs, my mother, Marie Goings, did her best with the abilities, time, and resources she possessed to treat us all with love, fairness, gentleness, and a firm hand.

They Prioritize Motherhood Over Friendship
One of the glaring weaknesses in many mothers today is their misguided belief and desire to put being their children’s friend above being their mother. This has caused many mothers and grandmothers to be guilty of creating and rearing rebellious and unruly children, who show-off and misbehave at home, school, church, and other settings. Mothers, please do not be guilty of creating a Frankenstein monster simply because you want your children to like you and to be your friend. They may not like you right now for holding firm to the rein of being a mother who dares to discipline and prioritize motherhood over friendship; however, as they age and grow up, they will understand it better by and by. Like so many have done, they will thank and appreciate you for the motherly role you have played in their lives.
Let me close by saying, thanks to all of the mothers, who are truly caring and serving in the upkeep and well-being of your children, grandchildren, and any other dependent child who have been placed under your oversight.
In my opinion, one of the greatest and most rewarding responsibilities in life is being a mother.